Rafa defeats RRBC to win 5th RG title

I’m too emotional to write in a coherent manner, so I’ll let Rudyard Kipling do the talking, with a line from my favourite poem;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run –
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man my son
!”

Mallorcan Rafael Nadal Parera defeated Robin Bo Carl Soderling, 6-4, 6-2, 6-4, to win his 7th Slam title today.

Sod played well, but not up to his awesome standard during the rest of the tournament. Rafa played a wonderful match, hitting plenty of astounding winners, and looking more like his 2008 self.

Robin deserves so much fucking credit for his incredible run. He, for the second consecutive year, defeated the World #1 and defending champion, this time Roger Federer. He played brilliant tennis to come through a tough 5 set semi against Berdych.

As I’ve recently admitted, mainly thanks to our Queen Vitch Jills, I am becoming a Sod fan. He plays some amazing tennis, and is genuinely hilarious and awesome off court. Robin will now reach his career high ranking of World #6. Congrats on an amazing fortnight, dude. And good luck for Wimbledon. Hugs to Robin fans.

But today was about one man……

Rafa was more emotional than we’ve ever seen him after a match. He genuinely cried his heart out after winning his 5th Roland Garros title. He spoke of how difficult the last year was for him, what with the injury to the holy knees, the tear in his abdominal muscles, and seperation of his parents, and he thanked the crowd and his ever-present team for their support. He seems to be in a much better place now than he was last year, and I for one couldn’t be more proud to call myself a Rafa fan. He teared up again as the Spanish National Anthem, La Marcha Real, was played. Beautiful moment.

Rafa will now regain his World #1 ranking from Roger Federer, and heads into Wimbledon on a 22 match winning streak, after going undefeated in the clay season. Vamos!

Felicitaciones, campeon!!!

Massive hugs and love to all our fellow Rafa fans.

RG QFs; shit just got real

Dude. What a fucking day at RG.

HSM uber fave, and all round King of Awesome Nole lost to Jurgen Melzer in a tough and epic 5 setter. Nole had lead by two sets to love and a break. This was such a tough loss. But credit where it’s due, Melzer played the match of his fucking life. Well done to him. Hugs to our fellow Nole fans. Especially our resident Serbian BAMF Aleksa.

Melzer’s reward? A match with….

King of Clay Rafa, who took out his douchebag compatriot Nicolas Assmagro in straights. It was actually a tough match, Rafa made shitloads of unforced errors, but he came through in the end and that’s all that matters. Vamos!

In the ladies draw,

these two chicks will face off in the Semis. I love JJ so much, but TBH, a round of applause is required for the fucking amazing Slammin’ Sammy Stosur. She took out Haley Joel Henin and World #1 ReRe in consecutive matches. That is truly badass. My girl JJ beat Yaroslava Shvedova in straights. Ajde!

We will have a virgin slam winner lift the trophy. The WTA semis are tomorrow;

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

I’m gonna be about as fair and balanced as Faux News here and say I’d like to see JJ win this motherfucker. AJDE GLITTER TRAIN!

(I mean, I’d be happy for any of the others, who are all great, but I’m a JJ KAD)

Andiamo Italia!!! RG Womens Singles QFs

Fratelli d’Italia, l’Italia, s’é desta….*

Aww Franny, you do pure joy so fucking well

Italian BAMF Francesca Schiavone took out porridge in human form Blahroline in straights to become the first Italian chick in over 50 years to reach a Slam semi. Franny will now also reach the Top 10 for the first time in her career.

She’s clearly elated. Badass :’)

She’ll now face…

injured Lena, who beat an even more injured Nads in a shitfest of a match.

Nadia’s loss mean that Lena will now be the only Russian chick in the Top 10. WTF?

However, it also means that my girlcrush, bella Flavietta will re-enter the Top 10!

TWO FIERCE ITALIAN BAMFs IN THE TOP 10!!! FORZA!

Tomorrow’s OOP;

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

*every time I hear Fratelli d’Italia I almost tear up. I’m not even nearly fucking Italian. That is one BAMF national anthem.

This post is dedicated to the lovely Maz and Samy, aka @centac. Fierce Italian bella chica ❤

HOLY FUCKING SHIT aka RG Men’s Singles QFs

IS THIS REAL LIFE?

So long, asshole

ROBIN BO CARL SODERLING YOU BADASS MOTHERFUCKER!

Yes, that did just happen. The Sod beat defending champion TMD in four sets to reach his second consecutive Roland Garros semifinal. This means Fed may lose his #1 ranking. It also means Fed’s incredible semi streak comes to an end.  I’m going to resist the temptation of kicking Fedoucherer while he’s down. Suffice it to say, we here at HSM are pretty fucking jazzed for RRBC. Sorry to the decent Fedfans. But this isn’t about Federer. This is about RRBC’s awesome fucking tennis, his badassery, and his epic cheerleaders, our very own HVIC, Jills, and our Twitter sister @JulesDC. I’m so fucking happy for you guys!

To all the haters who said Sod would grab his ankles and let Fed roll past, SUCK IT! Don’t doubt the Swedish BAMF in future!

I must confess, I’ve never really liked Soderling. But for the last few months, Queen Vitch Jillian has been steadily changing my opinion of him. He has an incredible game, he’s funny in pressers, and is adorkable. I mean come on, any dude who’ll sing Gimme Gimme Gimme by ABBA is clearly win. So, I salute you, General Sod. RRBC will now play…

beautiful BAMF Tomas Berdych, who beat Misha in straights to reach his first ever slam semi. Berdy is wonderfully talented, and totally fucking adorable. After years of people calling him a choker, he’s really coming good.

Nice to see another HSM fave go deep.

This post is dedicated to Jills. I love you, Vitch.

Roland Garros Day 10: Suicide Pool

Can’t find a pic of today’s HERO, Samantha Jane Stosur, anywhere. So, this guy will have to do

This Spanish sweetheart came through a tough match with his fellow leftie, rising star Thomaz Belucci, in straight sets. Nole took 4 to beat Ginepri, exhausted HSM fave Nando lost to Assmagro,  and Jurgen Melzer beat BAMF Teimuraz Gabashvili.

As mentioned, Slammin’ Sammy Stosur beat Haley Joel Henin in three sets. EPIC FUCKING WIN. My girl JJ beat Dani in straights, ReRe beat Israel’s Shahar Pe’er, and Yaroslava Shvedova beat cutie Jarmila Groth.

http://bit.ly/bkRsoB

^Tomorrow’s OOP. Post your SP picks below.

Good luck guys!

Roland Garros Day 9: Suicide Pool

Thanks for saving an otherwise crappy day, Tomas!

HSM fave and ~uber BAMF~ Tomas Berdych knocked out Britain’s Andy Murray to reach his first QF at the French Open. Berdy played some great tennis, and was aggressive throughout.

Masha totally choked in the continuation of her match with the kid from the Sixth Sense, which sucked. Other shitty happenings included Jo retiring after just one set against Misha with a back problem, Stan choking against Fed, and my bella Flavia losing to Blahroline.

Flavia and her bff Gisela did however make it through in the doubles. Andiamo!!! And Marc! Lopez and his doubles partner made it through to the Quarters of the Men’s Doubles. Awesome.

If you’re still in the SP, make your picks below.

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

Good luck!

Roland Garros Suicide Pool: Day 8

I haz a sad. RAndy, Ferru and Juanqui all lost today, which is pretty fail.

HSM fave Masha’s match against RG’s fave daughter, Haley Joel Henin, was suspended while tied at a set all due to bad light. The fact that Masha even managed a set against Henin on clay is awesome. Davai! She’ll probably lose when play resumes, but I love her regardless.

Elsewhere; Rafa, Nole, injured Nando, JJ and ReRe all got wins.

Ok guys, those of you who are still in the SP can post your picks below.

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

Good luck!

(Just wanted to say ANDIAMO FLAVIA! Hope she kicks Blahroline’s butt tomorrow. Unlikely, but IDGAF, she’s a fierce bitch! Forza bella!)

Roland Garros Suicide Pool: Day 7

Today was, as Jills said on Twitter, BAMFtastic Friday at the French Open.

This beautiful BAMF, MaKiri, caused the biggest upset on the ladies’ side, defeating defending champ Sveta in a late match. The biggest on the men’s side came whan Doglopolov defeated Gonzo. In straights. *epic WTF face*

BAMFs who got shit done today included Nole, Nando, Rafa, Jo, Flavia and Masha.

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

Make your picks for day 7 below. The OOP is made of win.

Good luck, guys!

Roland Garros Suicide Pool Day 6

Basically, fuck you, bad weather.

Ok, so rain fucked everyone over today. Rafa, ReRe and others didn’t get to play one minute of their matches today, so tomorrow’s schedule is a nightmare. Ana Ivanovic lost, as did La Monf. JJ, MAndy and RAndy got good wins.

Seeing as today was rained out for a long time,  if some of your picks couldn’t play at all, you can make a new pick for today.

If you made a pick who’s match is uncompleted, yet started, then you can post a provisional pick below and should your day 5 pick win, then your provisional pick  will be your pick for tomorrow.

Should your day 5 pick lose after completing said match, then your provisional pick won’t mean shit. Soz.

Unless you picked them yesterday, you CANNOT pick a player who’s match is already in progress.

Hope that’s clear!

Good Luck, guys!

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

Roland Garros Suicide Pool: Day 3

We here at HSM love Richie, Feli and so on, so today sucked major ass for us.

Anyways, life goes on, here’s tomorrow OOP:

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/schedule8.html

As per usual, if your day 2 pick won, feel free to post your picks and back-ups in the comments below.

Good luck, guys!

Hotness of the Week: Marat Safin

Yes, ladies, it’s that time again. HotW is back, and this week our subject is Marat Safin.

Where do I start? Check out that smile!

Maratski workin a hood like only he could, his eyes are making me melt

Look. At. That. Body

Marat is a former World Number One, and he is delicious

He’s a total GQ Motherfuck€r

He retired at the end of last year, breaking the hearts of fangirls (and fanboys) worldwide

He looks shit hot even when sporting a black eye. Unf!

Part of his charm is that he just seems to not give a fuck. He’s like “I’m badass, deal with it”

*sobs* Remember this? Maratski is a two-time Grand Slam champion.

Basically, there’s no need for a summation in this case. He’s Marat Mikhailovich Safin, and he’s a sexy bastard.

Davai!

 

Nando downs Nole, Rafa blasts past Ferru

So, that was some performance by Fernando Verdasco Carmona!

This awesome HSM fave made his first ever Masters Series final by defeating

this awesome HSM fave. Poor Nole had a bad match, he just never really hit his stride. But that does not take away from the fact that Nando played some beautiful tennis, and really hit some amazing shots. So, Fernando Verdasco def. Novak Djokovic 6-2, 6-2. He’ll now face…

Rafa, who breezed passed fellow Armada hottie Ferru, 6-2, 6-3. Rafa was impressive, but not quite at the awesome level he reached in the QFs. Still, it’s so nice to see him back on the clay and kicking ass.

This was overall a good week for Ferru. He played some solid tennis, but just couldn’t deal with Rafa’s maaaad clay court skillz.

So. Rafa vs Nando tomorrow ladies and gentlemen. Buckle up, it’s gonna be some fucking ride.

Vamos chicos!

Mmmonte Carlo brings the epic matches

So, clay court tennis is made of shiny win. And today, one badass Frenchie and one badass Spaniard proved that point for us and our viewing pleasure

This dude*

 defeated this dude

in what was by far the match of the day. The tennis was incredible, with both men hitting their best level of tennis. So? JCF’s reward for winning this epic tennis battle? A match with….

Rafa. Nice reward, huh? /sarcasm Anyways, The King of Clay kicked some serious ass yet again today, coming through 0 and 1 again in under an hour. Va-fucking-mos!

Meanwhile…..

HSM fave Nando defeated fellow HSM fave Tomas Berdych to end a run of two straight losses against the Czech. Nando really needed the win, and will now face Montanes for a place in the semis. Vamos, Fer!  

Other notable stories; Nole sailing past Stanley the Manly, Nalby showing us that he’s back and he means business, Ferru taking out Old Man Ljubicic and the fact that 5 of the 8 quarter finalists are Spanish. Lovin’ your work, Armada!

Full results from Thursday, 15 April 2010

Singles – Third Round
[1] N Djokovic (SRB) d [13] S Wawrinka (SUI) 64 64
[2] R Nadal (ESP) d M Berrer (GER) 60 61
A Montanes (ESP) d [4] M Cilic (CRO) 64 64
[11] D Ferrer (ESP) d [8] I Ljubicic (CRO) 60 76(4)
[9] J Ferrero (ESP) d [5] J Tsonga (FRA) 61 36 75
[6] F Verdasco (ESP) d [10] T Berdych (CZE) 57 63 62
D Nalbandian (ARG) d [12] T Robredo (ESP) 63 64
P Kohlschreiber (GER) d P Petzschner (GER) 63 64

Doubles – Second Round
[1] D Nestor (CAN) / N Zimonjic (SRB) d J Melzer (AUT) / M Youzhny (RUS) 63 76(1)
[2] B Bryan (USA) / M Bryan (USA) d [WC] R Hutchins (GBR) / A Murray (GBR) 67(4) 62 10-2 
[6] L Kubot (POL) / O Marach (AUT) d N Almagro (ESP) / I Ljubicic (CRO) 64 67(4) 10-4
[7] S Aspelin (SWE) / P Hanley (AUS) d E Butorac (USA) / M Kohlmann (GER) 57 62 10-6
[8] M Knowles (BAH) / B Soares (BRA) d [WC] R Gasquet (FRA) / J Tsonga (FRA) W/O (Tsonga – right groin)

OOP for FRIDAY, 16 APRIL 2010

COURT CENTRAL start 10:30 am
[11] D Ferrer (ESP) vs P Kohlschreiber (GER)
[9] J Ferrero (ESP) vs [2] R Nadal (ESP)
[1] N Djokovic (SRB) vs D Nalbandian (ARG)
A Montanes (ESP) vs [6] F Verdasco (ESP)
[1] D Nestor (CAN) / N Zimonjic (SRB) vs [8] M Knowles (BAH) / B Soares (BRA)

COURT DES PRINCES start 1:00 pm
[4] W Moodie (RSA) / D Norman (BEL) vs [6] L Kubot (POL) / O Marach (AUT)
[5] M Bhupathi (IND) / M Mirnyi (BLR) vs [2] B Bryan (USA) / M Bryan (USA)
[7] S Aspelin (SWE) / P Hanley (AUS) vs D Ferrer (ESP) / M Lopez (ESP

 *I’d like to apologise for using that awful photo of the delicious BAMF that is JCF, but it’s the only one I could find!

 

Mmmmonte Carlo results and OOP

So, again, we’ve been a bit slack with posting. But we have lives outside of tennisKADism, and sometimes real life gets in the way. Again, you have our apologies.  M(mmm)onte Carlo is filled with hotties. Check out tomorrow’s OOP below, centre court is made of delicious win!

So, MAndy got his ass kicked today by PEHK. Dude got seriously owned. Poor old Muzz, he’s having a bad run of results, but the British media need to cut the bloke some slack. Bandwagoners.

Meanwhile, one Rafael Nadal Parera absolutely hammered De Bakker, one and love. Yummy. A breadstick and a bagel from Deli Nadal. Just what we like to see. Rafa only lost 12 points on De Bakker’s serve all match. VAMOS! Nalby also had a big win over Misha, and HSM fave Nole also sailed through to the 3rd Round.

Complete results for Wednesday, 14 April 2010

Singles – Second Round
[1] N Djokovic (SRB) d F Serra (FRA) 62 63
[2] R Nadal (ESP) d [Q] T de Bakker (NED) 61 60
P Kohlschreiber (GER) d [3] [WC] A Murray (GBR) 62 61 
D Nalbandian (ARG) d [7] M Youzhny (RUS) 46 63 76(5)
[8] I Ljubicic (CRO) d M Llodra (FRA) 63 76(3)
[9] J Ferrero (ESP) d B Becker (GER) 63 64
[11] D Ferrer (ESP) d [Q] A Golubev (KAZ) 63 62
[12] T Robredo (ESP) d V Troicki (SRB) 64 63
[13] S Wawrinka (SUI) d E Gulbis (LAT) 61 64
M Berrer (GER) d [14] J Monaco (ARG) 64 64
P Petzschner (GER) d [15] J Melzer (AUT) 76(4) 62
A Montanes (ESP) d A Seppi (ITA) 76(1) 36 60

Doubles – Second Round
D Ferrer (ESP) / M Lopez (ESP) d [3] L Dlouhy (CZE) / L Paes (IND) 63 62
[4] W Moodie (RSA) / D Norman (BEL) d N Djokovic (SRB) / V Troicki (SRB) 26 64 10-8

Doubles – First Round
[WC] R Gasquet (FRA) / J Tsonga (FRA) d M Granollers (ESP) / T Robredo (ESP) 26 64 10-7
E Butorac (USA) / M Kohlmann (GER) d G Garcia-Lopez (ESP) / S Wawrinka (SUI) 63 60  

OOP for THURSDAY, 15 APRIL 2010

COURT CENTRAL start 10:30 am
[10] T Berdych (CZE) vs [6] F Verdasco (ESP)
M Berrer (GER) vs [2] R Nadal (ESP)
[5] J Tsonga (FRA) vs [9] J Ferrero (ESP)
[1] N Djokovic (SRB) vs [13] S Wawrinka (SUI)
[WC] R Gasquet (FRA) / J Tsonga (FRA) vs [8] M Knowles (BAH) / B Soares (BRA)

COURT DES PRINCES start 10:30 am
[4] M Cilic (CRO) vs A Montanes (ESP)
[8] I Ljubicic (CRO) vs [11] D Ferrer (ESP)
[12] T Robredo (ESP) vs D Nalbandian (ARG)
P Petzschner (GER) vs P Kohlschreiber (GER)
[1] D Nestor (CAN) / N Zimonjic (SRB) vs J Melzer (AUT) / M Youzhny (RUS) – After Suitable Rest

COURT 2 start 12:00 noon
[7] S Aspelin (SWE) / P Hanley (AUS) vs E Butorac (USA) / M Kohlmann (GER)
[WC] R Hutchins (GBR) / A Murray (GBR) vs [2] B Bryan (USA) / M Bryan (USA)
N Almagro (ESP) / I Ljubicic (CRO) vs [6] L Kubot (POL) / O Marach (AUT) – After Suitable Rest

 

Hotness of the Week Chicks Edition; Flavia Pennetta

So, anyone who reads HSM regularly, or follows me on Twitter, will know that I have a total girlcrush on Miss Flavia Pennetta, or Bella Flavia, as I like to call her.

For starters, she has amazing legs

She just embodies typical Italian beauty and grace

Her smile makes my heart all fluttery, and she’s a chick FFS!

She has had sex on a tennis court before, as she admitted in an interview.  I want. With her.

She can “smize” amazingly well. Tyra Banks and her fivehead would approve

She has great fashion sense (love those shoes), but look at that smile! I love it!

She is a BAMF. She once said she’d “have a quickie with Marat Safin.” See? She’s just like us!

Le sigh. She really is bella.

When she was having a hard time personally in 2007, she didn’t let it ruin her. Hells no, she went away, worked on her tennis, and became the first Italian Chick to crack the Top 10. Awesome!

What is there left to say? She’s Italian, beautiful, sexy, cute, has a great sense of humour, would bone Maratski, is bubbly and vivacious, and a damn good tennis player.

I would totally marry Flavs and have her Italian babies. Le sigh.  She’s the only chick I’d ever say that about.

Forza Bella Flavia!