Ana Meets The RBC

I’ve really got nothing much to say, lol. These pictures are for Parker and Curt. I only saw her practicing once. Better late than never posting these ūüôā

I watched for about 10 minutes and then T-Berd and Robin came in, so I was psyched about that. Loved watching them practice until the damn rain ruined it. Robin sat next to Ana and they talked for a bit. Was fun to see.

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Hotness of the Week, chicks edition #1

We here at HSM pride ourselves on being great believers in equality. A fair few of our HSM readers are dudes, so, this post is for them. Our very first HotW chick subject is Ana Ivanovic.

She is blazing hot

For someone so shy and dorky, she does “come hither” eyes pretty well

The girl rocks sexy clothes damn well

She knows how to work the camera

She looks good wet (!)

She grew up in a working class family and learned how to play tennis an an abandoned swimming pool. That is inspirational stuff, y’all

She says she’s “trilled” all the time, which is fucking adorable

Again, she rocks wetness well

She is a UNICEF ambassador, which shows that she’s beautiful both inside and out

She is a grand slam champion, and quite frankly, deserves more fucking respect than she often gets

So, Ana won a match today, and is hot and beautiful and sweet. We salute you, Baby E.  AJDE!

(This post is really dedicated to Curt and Parker, for being loyal and epic Ana fans. We love you guys)

The Exo I Almost Missed…

…and that everyone else really did miss. Because there weren’t very many people there. For some reason I thought the Glam. Set. Match exo with Ana, Nole, Mel B, and Jay Sean was going to be at night, like around 7PM. I was watching Jo (he practiced forever) and I just happened to overhear someone telling someone the¬†exo was happening now, so I headed over there. The bottom line is, the SEO didn’t promote it like they should have. I bet 90% of the people in the park didn’t know it was happening.

There was no security (that cared anyway), so you could sit wherever you want. I snuck down to the area with the dedicated seats, the ones reserved for “important people,” i.e. people who rarely use them unless the big guys are playing. I probably could have gotten closer if I’d gone to the other side, but I only caught the last 15 minutes or so so I didn’t want to move again. The pictures I saw posted on some other blogs show no one in the audience, but there were a fair amount of people on the other side of the stadium (the side I was sitting on), where people would normally walk in from the grounds.

To be honest I have no idea what really happened. Ana won right? They were serving underhand and playing the kind of tennis you’d play with a 4 yr old, so that was pretty funny. That’s basically all I know. Anyway, here are some pictures:

WHAT THE FUCK WAS MOYA DOING THERE? WATCH OUT ANA. (I didn’t even notice he was there until I saw this pic lol).

All the pictures are Jills property. Don’t take any of them without her¬†permission. Thanks.

Windy Conditions = WTF results?

Hey look: a post about Indian Wells. There were good results, bad results and results that make you go WTF is going on? The wind was going on. It looked so windy yesterday. ¬†Some players where able to deal with it; some weren’t. Let’s start with the good results, shall we?

Nando beat some guy I never heard of 64 61. So good day at the office. Didn’t catch the match so don’t know what happened.

Rafa and his¬†grandpa¬†shorts played his first match since the AO. He played rather well considering the fucked up conditions. He beat Old Man Schuettler, 64 64. He looks healthy¬†and¬†that’s all that matters, but those shorts are fugly as hell.

Then we have Nole. Don’t worry ppl he won- but it wasn’t pretty. He beat Fish, 61 06 62. There’s something weird with that score. Oh yeah- Nole got bageled by the new thinner Mardy in the second set. Really WTF Nole?¬†I fell ¬†asleep for a moment and woke up to see that Nole won the first set rather easily. Then he gets bageled by Fish of all ppl. Well he won at the end and that’s all that matters.

The biggest WTF? and upset was Marin losing and¬†getting bageled by Garcia-Lopez, giving GarLo his first win of the year, 76(1) 60. I can’t find pics of that match anywhere, maybe it’s for the best. Marin was horrible in that last set. The dude can’t deal with the wind. It was error after error. I think Goran needs to get a wind machine and make Marin practice in some court with the mentioned machine.¬†¬†Thanks for fucking up everyones ATP bracket, Marin. Moving on to the chicks.

The only WTA match that I sort of saw was Bepa. FU Tennis Channel. Trying to watch this match was the reason I fell asleep and missed the first set of Nole/Fish. I wasn’t interested¬†in the match in the first place so I’m not going to say anything else about it.

I will just give the usual results for the WTA.

Thanks for sort of saving my day on the WTA side, Vika. She beat Bammer 61 75. Now to the bad news.

Ana lost. I’m not¬†surprised. Windy + Fucked up ball toss = Loss. Now Ana is out of the Top 50. Welcome back to the qualies, Ana. She lost a shit load of points since she made the final last year. Maybe this is really rock bottom and things will get better? That’s all I have left: hope. Moving on.

Now the biggest upset and WTF? Top seed Kuzz losing to Suarez Navarro,64 46 61¬†. I will accept this loss by Kuzz since she had the most awesome Twitter tirade evah. Last night she became my favorite tennis player on Twitter. Not that she wasn’t amazing before. Twitter has become 100% more awesome since she joined. ¬†If you don’t follow her or don’t have a Twitter account¬†I¬†recommend¬†you follow her or get an account, http://twitter.com/SvetlanaK27 Yes, Sveta, fuck the haters and don’t worry I’m not “jurging” you. Much love, see you in Miami.

Full Results: Saturday, March 13, 2010

Men’s Singles – Second Round
[2] N Djokovic (SRB) d M Fish (USA) 61 06 62
[3] R Nadal (ESP) d [Q] R Schuettler (GER) 64 64
[5] N Davydenko (RUS) d E Gulbis (LAT) 64 64
G Garcia-Lopez (ESP) d [8] M Cilic (CRO) 76(1) 60
[10] F Verdasco (ESP) d [Q] R Delgado (PAR) 64 61
[11] J Ferrero (ESP) d D Koellerer (AUT) 63 60
[15] J Isner (USA) d [Q] K Anderson (RSA) 63 75
[Q] B Dabul (ARG) d [16] G Simon (FRA) 75 64
[17] S Querrey (USA) d J Chardy (FRA) 63 64
[19] T Berdych (CZE) d F Serra (FRA) 75 46 64
[20] I Ljubicic (CRO) d [WC] R Harrison (USA) 62 76(2)
[21] J Monaco (ARG) d F Fognini (ITA) 64 75
[25] P Kohlschreiber (GER) d P Petzschner (GER) 63 62
[26] T Bellucci (BRA) d [WC] C Moya (ESP) w/o (foot)
[29] V Troicki (SRB) d P Cuevas (URU) 10 ret. (back)
M Ancic (CRO) d [31] J Benneteau (FRA) 46 76(5) 63
Women’s Singles – Second Round
C Suarez Navarro (ESP) d [1] S Kuznetsova (RUS) 64 46 61
[3] V Azarenka (BLR) d S Bammer (AUT) 61 75
[6] J Jankovic (SRB) d [Q] P Martic (CRO) 63 76(2)
[8] S Stosur (AUS) d J Coin (FRA) 61 76(4
[9] F Pennetta (ITA) d P Kvitova (CZE) 63 63
[12] V Zvonareva (RUS) d [Q] S Stephens (USA) 64 75
[13] Y Wickmayer (BEL) d J Goerges (GER) 62 64
[14] K Clijsters (BEL) d B Zahlavova Strycova (CZE) 62 61
[17] S Peer (ISR) d [WC] B Mattek-Sands (USA) 62 63
R Vinci (ITA) d [21] D Hantuchova (SVK) 63 75
[23] A Kleybanova (RUS) d [Q] T Pironkova (BUL) 67(5) 63 61
A Sevastova (LAT) d [24] A Ivanovic (SRB) 62 64
[25] A Pavlyuchenkova (RUS) d [Q] K Sprem (CRO) 63 61
S Errani (ITA) d [26] D Cibulkova (SVK) 75 64
Men’s Doubles – First Round
*I Andreev (RUS) / E Korolev (KAZ) d [4] M Bhupathi (IND) / M Mirnyi (BLR) 64 64
[5] F Cermak (CZE) / M Mertinak (SVK) d B Becker (GER) / S Huss (AUS) 75 67(5) 10-8
I Karlovic (CRO) / D Vemic (SRB) d [7] M Fyrstenberg (POL) / M Matkowski (POL) 76(6) 76(3)
J Blake (USA) / A Roddick (USA) d R Hutchins (GBR) / A Murray (GBR) 75 76(5)
M Llodra (FRA) / A Ram (ISR) d M Damm (CZE) / R Stepanek (CZE) 57 63 10-7
J Brunstrom (SWE) / J Rojer (AHO) d J Knowle (AUT) / J Melzer (AUT) 64 46 10-5
* replaced N Almagro (ESP) / T Robredo (ESP) (Robredo – toe)
Women’s Doubles – Second Round
Y Chan (TPE) / J Zheng (CHN) d S Borwell (GBR) / R Kops-Jones (USA) 61 62
M Kirilenko (RUS) / A Radwanska (POL) d V Dushevina (RUS) / A Rodionova (AUS) 60 63

ORDER OF PLAY – SUNDAY, MARCH 14, 2010

STADIUM 1 start 11:00 am

[9] J Tsonga (FRA) vs [Q] M Matosevic (AUS) – ATP

Not Before 1:00 PM

[4] A Murray (GBR) vs A Seppi (ITA) – ATP

Not Before 3:00 PM

[18] J Zheng (CHN) vs [10] M Sharapova (RUS) – WTA

[1] R Federer (SUI) vs V Hanescu (ROU) – ATP

Not Before 7:00 PM

[Q] Y Lu (TPE) vs [7] A Roddick (USA) – ATP

Not Before 8:30 PM

[32] M Kirilenko (RUS) vs [2] C Wozniacki (DEN) – WTA

STADIUM 2 start 11:00 am

[5] A Radwanska (POL) vs [31] G Dulko (ARG) – WTA

Not Before 12:30 PM

[WC] M Lopez (ESP) / R Nadal (ESP) vs [3] L Dlouhy (CZE) / L Paes (IND) – ATP

[12] G Monfils (FRA) vs S Greul (GER) – ATP

Not Before 5:00 PM

K Flipkens (BEL) vs [4] E Dementieva (RUS) – WTA

J Blake (USA) vs [13] D Ferrer (ESP) – ATP

[16] N Petrova (RUS) vs S Peng (CHN) – WTA

STADIUM 3 start 11:00 am

A Clement (FRA) vs [27] M Baghdatis (CYP) – ATP

J Craybas (USA) vs [11] M Bartoli (FRA) – WTA

E Korolev (KAZ) vs [6] R Soderling (SWE) – ATP

[WC] D Nalbandian (ARG) vs [22] J Melzer (AUT) – ATP

M Russell (USA) vs [32] I Andreev (RUS) – ATP

COURT 4 start 11:00 am

[15] F Schiavone (ITA) vs [19] A Rezai (FRA) – WTA

[28] F Lopez (ESP) vs P Mathieu (FRA) – ATP

[6] B Mattek-Sands (USA) / Z Yan (CHN) vs [WC] T Garbin (ITA) / J Jankovic (SRB) – WTA

T Berdych (CZE) / P Kohlschreiber (GER) vs [2] B Bryan (USA) / M Bryan (USA) – ATP

F Lopez (ESP) / F Verdasco (ESP) vs [WC] M Ancic (CRO) / M Fish (USA) – ATP

[Q] R Mello (BRA) vs [24] A Montanes (ESP) – ATP

COURT 5 start 11:00 am

[30] J Tipsarevic (SRB) vs T de Bakker (NED) – ATP

[Q] E Baltacha (GBR) vs [WC] A Molik (AUS) – WTA

[5] A Kleybanova (RUS) / F Schiavone (ITA) vs I Benesova (CZE) / B Zahlavova Strycova (CZE) – WTA-TBA-After Suitable Rest

G Dulko (ARG) / F Pennetta (ITA) vs [2] N Llagostera Vives (ESP) / M Martinez Sanchez (ESP) – WTA-TBA-After Suitable Rest

COURT 6 start 11:00 am

[6] S Aspelin (SWE) / P Hanley (AUS) vs J Kerr (AUS) / F Polasek (SVK) – ATP

[23] I Karlovic (CRO) vs N Almagro (ESP) – ATP

[18] T Robredo (ESP) vs S Stakhovsky (UKR) – ATP

D Sela (ISR) vs [14] R Stepanek (CZE) – ATP

[1] D Nestor (CAN) / N Zimonjic (SRB) vs E Butorac (USA) / R Ram (USA) – ATP

 

All Fashion Police units to IW please

It’s IW time, bitches!!!

Last night saw the BNP Paribas Open Player’s Party. Here are some of our fave examples of the “fashion” on show.

Oh, Rafa. Your horrific fashion sense is utterly endearing

If any other player wore this, I’d give them shit for being mumsy. But I love Kim, and she really is a Mama. So, work it!

The Joe Six Pack of the ATP. He’s just a normal dude!

Next time someone calls Muzz “The Ginge Hotness”, I’m having them sectioned.

I’m a JJkad. So, I’ll just say this isn’t one of her worst efforts.¬† But seriously, WTF?

Ana and Sorana. I think both look beautiful. Ivanovic in particular looks gorgeous.

I am trying *so* hard not to say something mean (and truthful) about this. So, yeah. Just no.

LMAO. Oh Dani. I had an outfit just like this about 6 years ago. When I was 16 and didn’t know any better.

So, HSMers, who did YOU think was the Best/Worst dressed?

Australian Open: Day 4

Another day done and dusted. There were a couple of “upsets”. Well they’re not really upsets, but I’m upset about it. So, I’m going to get the bad things out of the way first.

FFS, Ferru. What I’m going to do with you? You where up 2 sets to none. Then you go all headcasey and lose in 5 to Baggy. I’m so pissed. I just want to slap some sense into the man. Yeah, yeah Baggy played great and his fans were annoying as hell. Whatevs.

Another of my faves that I want to slap some sense to, Ana. I’m really getting tired of this crap. The girl needs to get real and get a sport¬†psychologist. ¬†Her press conference was a total gem. The press conferences are not¬†therapy sections, Ana.¬†¬†I get that she’s still trying to be positive is not like she has to be all Dina like. I just think Ana is not being real with herself. ¬†Until she does things won’t get better. Moving on.

Djokohones in full force.

Nole had a bit of a scare losing the first set to that other Swiss dude not named Fed or Stan. He played like crap that first set with tons of errors. By the 2nd he got his shit together and won rather easy. Good Boy.

Someone that also got his shit together, Nando. He cruised against Sergeyev. Thank Sven, he will probably have to play Kolya at some point and well the dude is looking really scary.

Pico won in 5 sets against Frenchie Llodra. I didn’t see the match since it seems all the matches I do want to see are put at the same time. I did want to show that they gave Pico a new ADIDAS kit. It’s not as bad as Nando because of the¬†lack of a¬†collar but the shorts are fug as hell.

Jo looks so adorable in this pic. That’s why I posted it. I’m not going to lie. He won rather easy against Dent. WTG Jo. Moving on to some WTA.

She looks so cute. Caro cruised in  to the 3rd round. She beat Goerges in straights. YAY, Sunshine!!

Now onto Caro’s BFF, bitch and eternal badass, Vika. She was amazing and handed out some baked products. She won in straights and bageled some Swiss chick in the 2nd set.

Complete Scores: Here

Friday’s OOP:¬†Here

 

Anita Takes To The Practice Courts

Some cute hot thing that likes to fist pump and giggle a lot has taken to the Melbourne Park practice courts.  Since we like to throw a bone to the fanboys:

Ana Pic Spam Alert!!!

Gorgeous smile.

Sven!!!! Worship him, bitches!!

That’s it Anita, work on that backhand. Also, work on that ball toss. Okay, thanks.

I really hope she does well this year. She and JMac¬†are doing the draw for the AO. Please Tennis Gods don’t fuck Ana over with the draw.

Thanks to Curtis for the pics.