Mmmonte Carlo brings the epic matches

So, clay court tennis is made of shiny win. And today, one badass Frenchie and one badass Spaniard proved that point for us and our viewing pleasure

This dude*

 defeated this dude

in what was by far the match of the day. The tennis was incredible, with both men hitting their best level of tennis. So? JCF’s reward for winning this epic tennis battle? A match with….

Rafa. Nice reward, huh? /sarcasm Anyways, The King of Clay kicked some serious ass yet again today, coming through 0 and 1 again in under an hour. Va-fucking-mos!

Meanwhile…..

HSM fave Nando defeated fellow HSM fave Tomas Berdych to end a run of two straight losses against the Czech. Nando really needed the win, and will now face Montanes for a place in the semis. Vamos, Fer!  

Other notable stories; Nole sailing past Stanley the Manly, Nalby showing us that he’s back and he means business, Ferru taking out Old Man Ljubicic and the fact that 5 of the 8 quarter finalists are Spanish. Lovin’ your work, Armada!

Full results from Thursday, 15 April 2010

Singles – Third Round
[1] N Djokovic (SRB) d [13] S Wawrinka (SUI) 64 64
[2] R Nadal (ESP) d M Berrer (GER) 60 61
A Montanes (ESP) d [4] M Cilic (CRO) 64 64
[11] D Ferrer (ESP) d [8] I Ljubicic (CRO) 60 76(4)
[9] J Ferrero (ESP) d [5] J Tsonga (FRA) 61 36 75
[6] F Verdasco (ESP) d [10] T Berdych (CZE) 57 63 62
D Nalbandian (ARG) d [12] T Robredo (ESP) 63 64
P Kohlschreiber (GER) d P Petzschner (GER) 63 64

Doubles – Second Round
[1] D Nestor (CAN) / N Zimonjic (SRB) d J Melzer (AUT) / M Youzhny (RUS) 63 76(1)
[2] B Bryan (USA) / M Bryan (USA) d [WC] R Hutchins (GBR) / A Murray (GBR) 67(4) 62 10-2 
[6] L Kubot (POL) / O Marach (AUT) d N Almagro (ESP) / I Ljubicic (CRO) 64 67(4) 10-4
[7] S Aspelin (SWE) / P Hanley (AUS) d E Butorac (USA) / M Kohlmann (GER) 57 62 10-6
[8] M Knowles (BAH) / B Soares (BRA) d [WC] R Gasquet (FRA) / J Tsonga (FRA) W/O (Tsonga – right groin)

OOP for FRIDAY, 16 APRIL 2010

COURT CENTRAL start 10:30 am
[11] D Ferrer (ESP) vs P Kohlschreiber (GER)
[9] J Ferrero (ESP) vs [2] R Nadal (ESP)
[1] N Djokovic (SRB) vs D Nalbandian (ARG)
A Montanes (ESP) vs [6] F Verdasco (ESP)
[1] D Nestor (CAN) / N Zimonjic (SRB) vs [8] M Knowles (BAH) / B Soares (BRA)

COURT DES PRINCES start 1:00 pm
[4] W Moodie (RSA) / D Norman (BEL) vs [6] L Kubot (POL) / O Marach (AUT)
[5] M Bhupathi (IND) / M Mirnyi (BLR) vs [2] B Bryan (USA) / M Bryan (USA)
[7] S Aspelin (SWE) / P Hanley (AUS) vs D Ferrer (ESP) / M Lopez (ESP

 *I’d like to apologise for using that awful photo of the delicious BAMF that is JCF, but it’s the only one I could find!

 

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More Tuesday Randomness

Guess who?

OK, there should be some rule that if you’re a hairy skinny white dude, you shouldn’t be shirtless next to Feli. It doesn’t work.

Thank you, Janko. You give the girls what they want. I salute you. However, did you really have to practice with Lames Blake? I mean it’s kind of a bonerkill.

Not to mention I had to pretend like I was taking some pics of Lames so I didn’t look like a total stalker. But I forgive you.

Poor Carlos. He had to withdraw, and he got attacked by kids before that. Yes, Tuesday was “Kids Day” or whatever. They were *everywhere.*  Honestly, kids should be banned from the tournament. Except for the ballkids, obvs.

Totally besties. In my mind. And that’s all that matters.

Why did he have to lose? FML. Honestly. To be a FrenchieKAD is to suffer.

I saw Vika practicing twice on Tuesday. Once with CanWoz and once with her hitting partner or whatever. She was really in a good mood, smiling, saying “nice shot” and other compliments to CanWoz.

I guess Miami holds good memories for her. Hope she wins again.

Of course randomness wouldn’t be randomness without a Mo sighting. I was walking out of the park to go home. Took the back way that passes Court 4 and there’s Mo’s head in my path, lol. He was rather randomly watching the Baltacha match on an outer court. I guess he’s a fan. And since he’s Mo, he couldn’t sit like everyone else. He had to stand. He’s that awesome.

All the pictures are Jills property. Don’t take any of them without her permission. Thanks.

Bloodbath

Yesterday was a dark day at IW. There was only a little bit of life and hope left. Some Serbs and a Spanish dude that I flove with all my heart had to something with that. Let’s see what happened. I will start like always with the good news.

Rafa cruised against Ancic winning, 62 62. Good to have Mario back and happy that he lost *Merciless KAD* Also good news; Rafa knows how fugly his shorts are and said that he will be only wearing them this week. Rafa, next time ask for a sample of the finished product, not just the sketches. Sometimes things on paper look better than in person, this is one of those cases.

The good news about Nole is that he won. The bad news, he keeps playing like shit. He beat Kohls 63 26 76(3). He saved like 3 MPs, not sure since I was totally frazzled and pissed. Nole save some of that shitty play if you play Rafa in the semis. Kthxbye.

I had to post this pic. I’m still cracking up, it’s just so JJ. Well she won, but she also played like shit. She beat Errani, 26 76(6) 64.  Her serve was crap, I know her serve is not the best but  this was too much. Where is her awesome backhand down the line? I think I saw it somewhere but it landed in the doubles alley.

Now to the bloodbath of players that I like or love. Here is the victims list.

Nando, Oh Nando. He got trashed by Berdy,60 63. Yep, that’s a bagel. WTF Nando? Sigh.

Vika WTF happened? Sigh. She lost to Martinez Sanchez in straights,76(4) 62.

Bella Flavi lost to Peer,64 67(4) 61. This one is more for Emma than for me.  Sorry, vitch.

Kim lost to Kleybs. Kleybs!!! It seems Klebs likes to beat nice girls that are slam champions. You’re not Ana, Kim!! The score 64 16 76(4) and that last set TB was a total WTF? I still don’t know what went on.

Juanqui lost to Pico,76(2) 36 63. I hate when players that I like meet so early at a tourney. I love Pico but I kind of love Juanqui more, it’s the Spanish thing. I’m okay with this loss. I will give a couple of reasons. Juanqui has won a couple of titles and Pico needed it more. The most important reason? We where left with this:

Hotness and eternally hard nipples. YUM!

Full Results: Monday, March 15, 2010

Men’s Singles – Third Round
[2] N Djokovic (SRB) d [25] P Kohlschreiber (GER) 63 26 76(3)
[3] R Nadal (ESP) d M Ancic (CRO) 62 62
[19] T Berdych (CZE) d [10] F Verdasco (ESP) 60 63
[21] J Monaco (ARG) d [11] J Ferrero (ESP) 76(2) 36 63
[15] J Isner (USA) d [17] S Querrey (USA) 76(3) 64
[20] I Ljubicic (CRO) d [Q] B Dabul (ARG) 62 63
G Garcia-Lopez (ESP) d [26] T Bellucci (BRA) 46 62 61
Women’s Singles – Third Round
[28] M Martinez Sanchez (ESP) d [3] V Azarenka (BLR) 76(4) 62
[6] J Jankovic (SRB) d S Errani (ITA) 26 76(6) 64
[8] S Stosur (AUS) d [25] A Pavlyuchenkova (RUS) 63 60
[17] S Peer (ISR) d [9] F Pennetta (ITA) 64 67(4) 61
[12] V Zvonareva (RUS) d A Sevastova (LAT) 62 63
[13] Y Wickmayer (BEL) d R Vinci (ITA) 61 36 63
[23] A Kleybanova (RUS) d [14] K Clijsters (BEL) 64 16 76(4)
C Suarez Navarro (ESP) d [27] A Szavay (HUN) 64 36 61
Men’s Doubles – Second Round

[1] D Nestor (CAN) / N Zimonjic (SRB) d J Blake (USA) / A Roddick (USA) 64 36 10-7
[6] S Aspelin (SWE) / P Hanley (AUS) d J Benneteau (FRA) / J Tsonga (FRA) 76(4) 63
I Karlovic (CRO) / D Vemic (SRB) d D Ferrer (ESP) / A Montanes (ESP) 63 46 12-10
Women’s Doubles – Second Round
[1] C Black (ZIM) / L Huber (USA) d A Amanmuradova (UZB) / D Kustova (BLR) 62 62
[3] N Petrova (RUS) / S Stosur (AUS) d A Hlavackova (CZE) / L Hradecka (CZE) 64 60
K Peschke (CZE) / K Srebotnik (SLO) d N Grandin (RSA) / A Spears (USA) 61 62

Things That Made Stoogle Happy

Yeah, yeah we’ve been lazy. I did post the Nando CK thing and the Gypsy vid. Well I was really busy and couldn’t post as much as I wanted to. I did keep up with the tennis news and was really happy with some of the results. There where 2 guys that made me really happy.  So I’ll give you the Adventures of Juanqui and Ferru, the forgotten Armada guys.

How about that old guy Juan Carlos Ferrro?

Being in 3 finals during the South America clay-court swing and winning 2. Yeah, the dude should totally retire.

Ferru winning Acapulco and being awesome. FYI the trophy is not a Pear it’s a Guaje. Look it up people.

Juanqui and Ferru played each other in back to back finals. Juanqui took Buenos Aires and Ferru Acapulco. The most awesome thing that I discovered? Their bromance. They totally rival Nando and Feli. I haven’t seen so much ass kissing in a trophy ceremony since, I don’t know, ever.

The Giggling.

The whispering. Sigh

The Champagne fight. *Squeeee*

Yep, they totally rival Nando and Feli. I’m sure there is a video somewhere of them singing to each other. After their adventures in the South America clay-court swing there was Davis Cup. Juanqui had to withdraw, the dude is old and played a fucking lot he needed his rest. So they replaced him with Almagro aka Judas and he was totally worthless. THE DEAD RUBBER DOESN’T COUNT ASSHOLE!! No wonder he’s on my shit list. So Ferru almost won the tie against the Swiss by himself. Yes, I will give credit to Tommy and Marcel they did win the doubles rubber. But Ferru was the hero and even Bageled Stan. My man has big cojones. A Davis Cup warrior, that’s still has a perfect record on DC matches on clay.

I flove him so much.

Compatriots battle it out, thrice

 

Vamos!

HSM fave JCF defeated his fellow Armada man Ferru, 5-7, 6-4, 6-3 in the final of the 2010 Copa Telmex event. It was Juanqui’s 2nd title victory in two weeks, so good for you, chico. Tough break for Ferru. We love him too.

 

Meanwhile, the Samurai defeated his compatriot Tree in the Memphis final, by 6-7, 7-6, 6-3. Well done, big man.

And last but by no means least, Michael Llodra beat Apricot Bars to claim the Marseille crown, 6-4, 6-4. This was a great result for the older French dude. Kudos!

The ATP World Tour moves on to Dubai (500), Acapulco (500) and Delray Beach (250) this week.  Notable remarks; Fed withdraws from Dubai with a chest infection, Rafa still out with knee issues.

Heineken Open: The Day The Hotness Died

Today at the Heineken Open there was a hotness massacre. I’m really close to not caring about this tournament anymore. Let’s start.

The first victim was Juanqui. I think this was the worse of all. He didn’t even get to play a whole set.  At 3-1, he fell and sprained his right ankle and was forced to retire. Now he seems questionable for the AO. FU, Tennis Gods. There are no pics of this match, so I posted a pic of him with puppies, because it’s cute and it makes me happy. Let’s continue.

Another victim of the massacre, Ferru. Sigh. He lost  75 64 to frenchie Clement.  Again, there are no pics of this match. So I posted an old one. I imagine that Ferru totally looked like this during the match. Next.

Pico lost to Tree in 3 sets, 57 64 63. I’m amazed that none were TB sets. I like Tree but I wanted Pico to win. Whatevs. Again, there were no pics of this match, so I posted a pic of Pico and his eternally hard nipples.

There was also Thomaz. He lost to Kohls,  64 61. At least he won a match on hard-courts and he’s still in doubles.  There were also no pics of this match. So I posted a pic of  Thomaz celebrating  his first ATP title. Good times.

The only one that survived the hotness massacre was Tommy. He beat Greul in 2 TB sets, 76(1) 76(2). Also, this was the only match that had pictures. Well, out of the matches that I care for. There were a grand total of 2 pics and they where horrible. This was the best of the two.  All of the good photographers seem to be in Australia. Pffffff.

Complete Scores: Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Singles – Second Round
[1] T Robredo (ESP) d S Greul (GER) 76(1) 76(2)
A Clement (FRA) d [2] D Ferrer (ESP) 75 64
[Q] M Lammer (SUI) d [3] J Ferrero (ESP) 31 ret. (right ankle sprain)
M Gicquel (FRA) d [4] N Almagro (ESP) 60 63
[5] P Kohlschreiber (GER) d T Bellucci (BRA) 64 61
[6] J Melzer (AUT) d [WC] S Grosjean (FRA) 62 67(5) 76(1)
J Isner (USA) d [7] J Monaco (ARG) 57 64 63
[8] A Montanes (ESP) d [WC] J Statham (NZL) 76(6) 62
Doubles – Quarter-finals
J Brunstrom (SWE) / J Rojer (AHO) d [2] L Dlouhy (CZE) / L Paes (IND) 62 63
[WC] M Daniell (NZL) / H Tecau (ROU) d [3] M Granollers (ESP) / T Robredo (ESP) 36 76(5) 10-8
R Wassen (NED) / H Zeballos (ARG) vs M Melo (BRA) / B Soares (BRA)
T Bellucci (BRA) / A Sa (BRA) d L Arnold Ker (ARG) / J Monaco (ARG) 75 64