HOLY FUCKING SHIT aka RG Men’s Singles QFs


So long, asshole


Yes, that did just happen. The Sod beat defending champion TMD in four sets to reach his second consecutive Roland Garros semifinal. This means Fed may lose his #1 ranking. It also means Fed’s incredible semi streak comes to an end. ¬†I’m going to resist the temptation of kicking Fedoucherer while he’s down. Suffice it to say, we here at HSM are pretty fucking jazzed for RRBC. Sorry to the decent Fedfans. But this isn’t about Federer. This is about RRBC’s awesome fucking tennis, his badassery, and his epic cheerleaders, our very own HVIC, Jills, and our Twitter sister @JulesDC. I’m so fucking happy for you guys!

To all the haters who said Sod would grab his ankles and let Fed roll past, SUCK IT! Don’t doubt the Swedish BAMF in future!

I must confess, I’ve never really liked Soderling. But for the last few months, Queen Vitch Jillian has been steadily changing my opinion of him. He has an incredible game, he’s funny in pressers, and is adorkable. I mean come on, any dude who’ll sing Gimme Gimme Gimme by ABBA is clearly win. So, I salute you, General Sod. RRBC will now play…

beautiful BAMF Tomas Berdych, who beat Misha in straights to reach his first ever slam semi. Berdy is wonderfully talented, and totally fucking adorable. After years of people calling him a choker, he’s really coming good.

Nice to see another HSM fave go deep.

This post is dedicated to Jills. I love you, Vitch.


Ana Meets The RBC

I’ve really got nothing much to say, lol. These pictures are for Parker and Curt. I only saw her practicing once. Better late than never posting these ūüôā

I watched for about 10 minutes and then T-Berd and Robin came in, so I was psyched about that. Loved watching them practice until the damn rain ruined it. Robin sat next to Ana and they talked for a bit. Was fun to see.

Wednesday Randomness

Just trying to catch up so I can post some Rafa and Nole stuff. Here are some pics from yesterday. (The only match I watched yesterday was Jeremy-Mario, and well, I didn’t take any pics bc I was up at the 400 level. I pretty much make it a rule to never go in the stadium, so I never bother buying more expensive seats. I’m still pissed at the stupid organizers for putting them on the stadium, pffft WHATEVER THANKS ALOT FUCKERS. My faves are underdogs and losers and headcases and I’m damn proud of that and they had no place in the stadium playing eachother. DAMMIT. Oh, and then I saw the END of Richie vs Peregrin Took (or Meriwether Brandybuck) idk which fucking hobbit he lost to but it sucked. Hobbits are shitlisted. /endrant)

Yeah, Muzz and Marcos practiced together. One half awesome, one half significantly less awesome. You make the call.

Am I the last one to know that Misha isn’t with Adidas anymore? He’s with Los? Adidas is really making some bad choices. Pffft.

He’s going to make a great actor with all his expressions.

Don’t hate, this was hot. As I said before, they’re besties in my mind now.

Besties with benefits. If I just freaked you out, I’m not sorry.

All of the pictures are Jills property. Please don’t take them without her consent. Thanks

Don’t. Make. Me. Like. Him!!!!! *Pouts*

So one the awesome things about Miami is all the media stuff the players do. ¬†There’s the players party and bunch of other stuff. Like Ana and Rafa golfing, Muzz and Vee playing tennis in some street on top of some SUV. One of the staples of the Miami promos? The players¬†swimming¬†with dolphins, like they do it every year. So this year,these dudes participated.

As you guys can see some of my faves, participated: Ferru, Gonzo and Thomaz. There was also Sod, Marcelo Melo, Eduardo Schwank and Dick Norman ( I had to look for his profile, no idea who is this dude. He’s actually a tennis player but hasn’t played any matches. Wut?) I looked for this Norman guy because of this pic alone.

So cute!!! He’s kissing the dolphin!!!

Ferru swimming with a Dolphin. All I can say is Squeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

You guys know that I really don’t like Sod. I have this¬†irrational dislike for him. I think most Rafa KADs do. I have been softening ¬†up to ¬†him the past few weeks. I’ve been blaming a bunch of things. First his tweets( hello! tiny helicopter), then Jills who likes him. My Alexander Skarsgard love (for those who follow me on Twitter know how much I love True Blood and this BAMF¬†Swede) so I’ve been saying than I’ve been reflecting my love for ASkars¬†¬†into Sod just because they’re both Swedish. Stupid I know. ¬†Why do I mention all of this? Because of shit like this keeps happening.

The fucker is posing with a dolphin and it’s totally melting my vitch heart.

Yes, the title of the post is all about him. Can he stop? Please. Sigh.

Meanwhile, In The Rafa-Less Side Of The Draw…

Hey…remember me? Your friendly neighborhood snarker/tennis stalker/¬†Fed-hater? OK, good. Apologize for not posting since forever, but it’s really my chronic laziness syndrome, and I can’t help that I’m afflicted with it. Going to try to post more, especially next week from Miami. Anyway, here’s the results recap from yesterday’s Rafa-less action:

The women’s semis were today. I confess I only watched the end of the second one. I’m starting to feel a little existential angst about the absurdity of the women’s draw. Yeah I know, in the end we do have two of the top women’s seeds in the final, but at this point that’s almost weirder to me than if it was 2 randoms. Especially since neither finalist has had very good results this year til now.

I picked Stosur in the tipping game, so of course she lost. Apparently JJ is playing really well.

And she’s got her last name on her racquet in case she forgets who she is or what her racquet looks like. Which is, you know, possible with her. JJ, would a little consistency kill you? I mean, lose your first match to Sevastova in Monterrey and now you’re in a Premier Mandatory final the following week? At least Ana is consistent, just sayin.

I caught the end of the A-Rad/Caro semi. Obviously lots of long rallies and some moonballing going on there, but I’m not hating on Caro. At least she didn’t lose early like everyone else who was picked to win this.

I used to be more of a JJ fan, but recently she’s started to bother me and I don’t know why. Too many stories about her being a bitch to fans, I guess. So I’m on Team Caro (or Team Viro, or Team Twitter) for the final.

Now on to the men. The first quarterfinal was basically lame. I mean I love Tommy to death, but he’s got to try something else against Dick bc whatever he’s been doing the last 11 matches is clearly not working. It’s possible he was still ill, but Dick was playing really well and was very focused. I think he thinks¬† he can win this tournament.

You’ve got a long way to go buddy. I mean, he really shouldn’t even be in the semis. It should be Fed. But Marcos took care of that (Sven bless him).¬†Thing is,¬†I actually think Marcos could have beaten Dick (heh), whereas Tommy clearly can’t. At any rate, Dick should enjoy being in the semis unexpectedly, because today he plays a guy he’s never beat.

This guy:

Robin Bo Carl dominated Muzz from the beginning. I love his game. Whatevs, I don’t care what his forehand looks like when he’s swinging it, I just care that he hits it hard and deep. I’m not a tennis technique connoisseur, people, I’m a tennis fast-food-oligist. Just give me want I want, I don’t care how you made it, that type of thing.

Where was I? Oh, yeah the DOMINATION. I don’t dislike Muzz anymore, but that was really fun to watch. Part of what I love about players like RBC, and Berd, and Nando, is that you never know what to expect. But when they’re on it’s amazing. Sod is 2-0 against Dick, once in indoor carpet and once on hardcourts. And that was a few years ago before Sod became a top 10 player. So in other words, bring it.

P.S. I honestly don’t see what so evil about a guy that tweets about Cheesecake Factory, jelly beans, and is ecstatically happy about his new remote control helicopter. I mean, really. It’s kinda adorbs. I think I’d have a hard time even hating Fed if he was doing that.

Oh, I almost forgot the doubles! We’ve got the EPICNESS that is Wild Card team Rafa and Marc! in the final!!!!¬†And last night was the other dubs semi, new-force-to-be-reckoned-with-dubs-team Quizner (Querrey & Isner) vs old standbys of awesomeness Ziki and Daniel.

And Ziki and Daniel won! Which is better for Rafa and Marc, I think. But at least either way, someone awesome is winning the doubles title. So IW has done something right for sure. And it’s going to be on TV! Vamos!

You Better Not Fuck It Up, Rafa.

Yesterday at IW was a really good day if you were a Rafa fan. His draw got a lot easier. Some ppl are¬†already¬†giving him the title. I’m not one of those ppl. I believe¬†in taking it¬†one match at the time. There still dangerous players in the draw. Who really though that Fed was going to lose to Baggy? Some ppl where hopeful ¬†*ahem* Jills. My point is that you never know with tennis; sometimes anything can happen. Anyway… now let’s see¬†the results, shall we?

Rafa beat Tree in 3 sets, 75 36 63. It was the first time they played and I was frazzled to no end. Tree is like an¬†improved¬†version of Dr. Ivo. His serve is just as good, he has better ground strokes and volleys, and I would totally jump his bones because he’s hot. Both Rafa and Tree were playing great in that 1st set. Rafa had¬†0 UFEs, yes ZERO. Rafa was playing great; I totally thought he was going to win in straights with the way he was playing. Then he totally brainfarted DFing 2 straight times (those were his first UFEs),¬†and Tree hit an awesome winner giving him BPs. ¬†Of course Tree took the gift that Rafa was giving him. Then the set was pretty much over because, well, we all know how it is with big servers. Then, in¬†the 3rd set, Tree began to tire. Rafa does that to you. Rafa broke him and held serve a couple of times. Rafa was really pumped. The End. FYI, Rafa and Marc! keep kicking ass in doubles. They won.

Now the reason why Rafa’s draw got a lot easier.

This guy lost. I’ve been saying that Nole was playing like shit the whole week. He lost to Mr. Clean, ¬†75 63. Yes, he lost to Old Man Ljubicic of all ppl and in straights. ¬†I just saw a little bit of the match because those fuckers at the IW organization decided that it was a great idea to put Nole and Rafa on at the same time. It seems Mr. Clean took a tennis viagra and if Nole¬†was playing like he was playing in his 2 previous matches, I totally get the result. ¬†I’m kind of worried for Serbia in DC, it’s going to be a really hard tie against the Croats. He lost to the oldest tennis player in Croatia, ffs. Moving on.

Berdy beat Vik, 61 63. He’s Rafa’s next opponent. I really don’t know what to think. I can’t say how he’s been playing from what I saw. Vik had played 1 game before this match. Enjoy the free points and easy money, Vik. I didn’t see the match with Nando but from reports it seems Nando was playing crappy. Rafa hasn’t lost to Berdy I think since 2006. Still frazzled. I’m a KAD what can I say?

Tommy beat Fed Killer Baggy in 3 sets, 75 06 64. That bagel totally has a explanation. It seems Tommy has a¬†big tummy ache. He has “the runs” like some commie said. So he better drink a lot of Pepto Bismol before his next match. He has to play this guy:

Dick beat Melzer, 76(5) 64. He has been playing great. Fed is out of his quarter, no chance for another loss from Fed’s hands. So he must be super pumped. This is a golden¬†opportunity for Dick.

Someone finally got rid of GarLo the bracket ruiner. That someone was Pico. I so want Pico to make the semis. Avenge Nole, Pico! He plays Mr. Clean next.

Sod beat Jo, ¬†63 64. It seems Sod owns Jo’s ass and I really don’t get it. The match seem super fast. Sod just cruised. WTF Jo?

Sod plays Muzz next. He won by retirement against Judas, 62 10 ret.. It seems Judas has an ankle injury. Well at least Judas got rid of Blah. Now to the chicks.

There were only two WTA matches. Remember when I said that I thought Lena was going to to win IW?

Well of course she lost to ARad,64 63.¬†Proving once again that you can’t trust Lena and that WTA predictions are useless. ARad hasn’t lost a set and she keeps being ignored. ¬†Her next¬†opponent?

Caro. She beat adorable Jie, 64 46 61. Can I get a moment of silence for my WTA tennis pool team? There’s a lot in line for Caro in the match against ARad. Not only¬†would she¬†make the final, ¬†she would become World #2, her highest ranking to date. I love Kiri but it seems Stella McCartney made the right choice by dumping Kiri for Caro. Even if the clothes looked better on Kiri, ppl are finally seeing her¬†designs.

Full Results: Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Men’s Singles – Fourth Round
[20] I Ljubicic (CRO) d [2] N Djokovic (SRB) 75 63
[3] R Nadal (ESP) d [15] J Isner (USA) 75 36 63
[4] A Murray (GBR) d N Almagro (ESP) 64 10 ret. (ankle)
[6] R Soderling (SWE) d [9] J Tsonga (FRA) 63 64
[7] A Roddick (USA) d[22] J Melzer (AUT) 76(5) 64
[18] T Robredo (ESP) d [27] M Baghdatis (CYP) 75 06 64
[19] T Berdych (CZE) d [29] V Troicki (SRB) 61 63
[21] J Monaco (ARG) d G Garcia-Lopez (ESP) 36 62 61
Ladies’ Doubles – Quarterfinals
[2] C Wozniacki (DEN) d [18] J Zheng (CHN) 64 46 61
[5] A Radwanska (POL) d [4] E Dementieva (RUS) 64 63
Men’s Doubles – Quarterfinals
[6] S Aspelin (SWE) / P Hanley (AUS) d J Brunstrom (SWE) / J Rojer (AHO) 63 63
[WC] M Lopez (ESP) / R Nadal (ESP) d M Llodra (FRA) / A Ram (ISR) 62 64
J Isner (USA) / S Querrey (USA) d I Karlovic (CRO) / D Vemic (SRB) 63 64
Ladies’ Doubles – Quarterfinals
[6] B Mattek-Sands (USA) / Z Yan (CHN) d [2] N Llagostera Vives (ESP) / M Martinez Sanchez (ESP) 76(3) 16 10-5
[3] N Petrova (RUS) / S Stosur (AUS) d I Benesova (CZE) / B Zahlavova Strycova (CZE) 26 62 10-7

This Guy Beat Fed?

Oh FFS, Robin Bo Carl. I gave you props. I was hyping you. I’m one of your only defenders. And now this? Unacceptable.

RBC lost to Ginepri(!) today in the first round of Chennai. This makes me and anyone else playing the tennis-pool a little sad. Stan The Man rolled through easily, though.

Tuesday’s Results:

Singles – First Round
R Ginepri (USA) d [1] R Soderling (SWE) 64 75
[3] S Wawrinka (SUI) d [WC] R Bopanna (IND) 61 64
[5] D Sela (ISR) d D Istomin (UZB) 61 62
[7] M Berrer (GER) d S Ventura (ESP) 63 62
[WC] S Devvarman (IND) d R Schuettler (GER) 75 62
L Lacko (SVK) d Y Lu (TPE) 64 63
K Kim (USA) d D Brands (GER) 62 62
M Russell (USA) d [Q] P Amritraj (IND) 63 61
M Granollers (ESP) d [Q] J Ward (GBR) 57 62 62
R Haase (NED) d [Q] T Yang (TPE) 64 63
S Robert (FRA) d [Q] L Sorensen (IRL) 62 61

Doubles- First Round
J Coetzee (RSA) / R Wassen (NED) d I Kunitsyn (RUS) / A Qureshi (PAK) 64 60

Wednesday OOP:

Looking at the draw, I’m fairly sure Janko will make the semis. So that’s something.