Rafa defeats RRBC to win 5th RG title

I’m too emotional to write in a coherent manner, so I’ll let Rudyard Kipling do the talking, with a line from my favourite poem;

“If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run –
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man my son!”

Mallorcan Rafael Nadal Parera defeated Robin Bo Carl Soderling, 6-4, 6-2, 6-4, to win his 7th Slam title today.

Sod played well, but not up to his awesome standard during the rest of the tournament. Rafa played a wonderful match, hitting plenty of astounding winners, and looking more like his 2008 self.

Robin deserves so much fucking credit for his incredible run. He, for the second consecutive year, defeated the World #1 and defending champion, this time Roger Federer. He played brilliant tennis to come through a tough 5 set semi against Berdych.

As I’ve recently admitted, mainly thanks to our Queen Vitch Jills, I am becoming a Sod fan. He plays some amazing tennis, and is genuinely hilarious and awesome off court. Robin will now reach his career high ranking of World #6. Congrats on an amazing fortnight, dude. And good luck for Wimbledon. Hugs to Robin fans.

But today was about one man……

Rafa was more emotional than we’ve ever seen him after a match. He genuinely cried his heart out after winning his 5th Roland Garros title. He spoke of how difficult the last year was for him, what with the injury to the holy knees, the tear in his abdominal muscles, and seperation of his parents, and he thanked the crowd and his ever-present team for their support. He seems to be in a much better place now than he was last year, and I for one couldn’t be more proud to call myself a Rafa fan. He teared up again as the Spanish National Anthem, La Marcha Real, was played. Beautiful moment.

Rafa will now regain his World #1 ranking from Roger Federer, and heads into Wimbledon on a 22 match winning streak, after going undefeated in the clay season. Vamos!

Felicitaciones, campeon!!!

Massive hugs and love to all our fellow Rafa fans.

RG QFs; shit just got real

Dude. What a fucking day at RG.

HSM uber fave, and all round King of Awesome Nole lost to Jurgen Melzer in a tough and epic 5 setter. Nole had lead by two sets to love and a break. This was such a tough loss. But credit where it’s due, Melzer played the match of his fucking life. Well done to him. Hugs to our fellow Nole fans. Especially our resident Serbian BAMF Aleksa.

Melzer’s reward? A match with….

King of Clay Rafa, who took out his douchebag compatriot Nicolas Assmagro in straights. It was actually a tough match, Rafa made shitloads of unforced errors, but he came through in the end and that’s all that matters. Vamos!

In the ladies draw,

these two chicks will face off in the Semis. I love JJ so much, but TBH, a round of applause is required for the fucking amazing Slammin’ Sammy Stosur. She took out Haley Joel Henin and World #1 ReRe in consecutive matches. That is truly badass. My girl JJ beat Yaroslava Shvedova in straights. Ajde!

We will have a virgin slam winner lift the trophy. The WTA semis are tomorrow;

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

I’m gonna be about as fair and balanced as Faux News here and say I’d like to see JJ win this motherfucker. AJDE GLITTER TRAIN!

(I mean, I’d be happy for any of the others, who are all great, but I’m a JJ KAD)

Andiamo Italia!!! RG Womens Singles QFs

Fratelli d’Italia, l’Italia, s’é desta….*

Aww Franny, you do pure joy so fucking well

Italian BAMF Francesca Schiavone took out porridge in human form Blahroline in straights to become the first Italian chick in over 50 years to reach a Slam semi. Franny will now also reach the Top 10 for the first time in her career.

She’s clearly elated. Badass :’)

She’ll now face…

injured Lena, who beat an even more injured Nads in a shitfest of a match.

Nadia’s loss mean that Lena will now be the only Russian chick in the Top 10. WTF?

However, it also means that my girlcrush, bella Flavietta will re-enter the Top 10!

TWO FIERCE ITALIAN BAMFs IN THE TOP 10!!! FORZA!

Tomorrow’s OOP;

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

*every time I hear Fratelli d’Italia I almost tear up. I’m not even nearly fucking Italian. That is one BAMF national anthem.

This post is dedicated to the lovely Maz and Samy, aka @centac. Fierce Italian bella chica ❤

HOLY FUCKING SHIT aka RG Men’s Singles QFs

IS THIS REAL LIFE?

So long, asshole

ROBIN BO CARL SODERLING YOU BADASS MOTHERFUCKER!

Yes, that did just happen. The Sod beat defending champion TMD in four sets to reach his second consecutive Roland Garros semifinal. This means Fed may lose his #1 ranking. It also means Fed’s incredible semi streak comes to an end.  I’m going to resist the temptation of kicking Fedoucherer while he’s down. Suffice it to say, we here at HSM are pretty fucking jazzed for RRBC. Sorry to the decent Fedfans. But this isn’t about Federer. This is about RRBC’s awesome fucking tennis, his badassery, and his epic cheerleaders, our very own HVIC, Jills, and our Twitter sister @JulesDC. I’m so fucking happy for you guys!

To all the haters who said Sod would grab his ankles and let Fed roll past, SUCK IT! Don’t doubt the Swedish BAMF in future!

I must confess, I’ve never really liked Soderling. But for the last few months, Queen Vitch Jillian has been steadily changing my opinion of him. He has an incredible game, he’s funny in pressers, and is adorkable. I mean come on, any dude who’ll sing Gimme Gimme Gimme by ABBA is clearly win. So, I salute you, General Sod. RRBC will now play…

beautiful BAMF Tomas Berdych, who beat Misha in straights to reach his first ever slam semi. Berdy is wonderfully talented, and totally fucking adorable. After years of people calling him a choker, he’s really coming good.

Nice to see another HSM fave go deep.

This post is dedicated to Jills. I love you, Vitch.

Roland Garros Day 10: Suicide Pool

Can’t find a pic of today’s HERO, Samantha Jane Stosur, anywhere. So, this guy will have to do

This Spanish sweetheart came through a tough match with his fellow leftie, rising star Thomaz Belucci, in straight sets. Nole took 4 to beat Ginepri, exhausted HSM fave Nando lost to Assmagro,  and Jurgen Melzer beat BAMF Teimuraz Gabashvili.

As mentioned, Slammin’ Sammy Stosur beat Haley Joel Henin in three sets. EPIC FUCKING WIN. My girl JJ beat Dani in straights, ReRe beat Israel’s Shahar Pe’er, and Yaroslava Shvedova beat cutie Jarmila Groth.

http://bit.ly/bkRsoB

^Tomorrow’s OOP. Post your SP picks below.

Good luck guys!

Roland Garros Day 9: Suicide Pool

Thanks for saving an otherwise crappy day, Tomas!

HSM fave and ~uber BAMF~ Tomas Berdych knocked out Britain’s Andy Murray to reach his first QF at the French Open. Berdy played some great tennis, and was aggressive throughout.

Masha totally choked in the continuation of her match with the kid from the Sixth Sense, which sucked. Other shitty happenings included Jo retiring after just one set against Misha with a back problem, Stan choking against Fed, and my bella Flavia losing to Blahroline.

Flavia and her bff Gisela did however make it through in the doubles. Andiamo!!! And Marc! Lopez and his doubles partner made it through to the Quarters of the Men’s Doubles. Awesome.

If you’re still in the SP, make your picks below.

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

Good luck!

Roland Garros Suicide Pool: Day 8

I haz a sad. RAndy, Ferru and Juanqui all lost today, which is pretty fail.

HSM fave Masha’s match against RG’s fave daughter, Haley Joel Henin, was suspended while tied at a set all due to bad light. The fact that Masha even managed a set against Henin on clay is awesome. Davai! She’ll probably lose when play resumes, but I love her regardless.

Elsewhere; Rafa, Nole, injured Nando, JJ and ReRe all got wins.

Ok guys, those of you who are still in the SP can post your picks below.

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

Good luck!

(Just wanted to say ANDIAMO FLAVIA! Hope she kicks Blahroline’s butt tomorrow. Unlikely, but IDGAF, she’s a fierce bitch! Forza bella!)

Roland Garros Suicide Pool: Day 7

Today was, as Jills said on Twitter, BAMFtastic Friday at the French Open.

This beautiful BAMF, MaKiri, caused the biggest upset on the ladies’ side, defeating defending champ Sveta in a late match. The biggest on the men’s side came whan Doglopolov defeated Gonzo. In straights. *epic WTF face*

BAMFs who got shit done today included Nole, Nando, Rafa, Jo, Flavia and Masha.

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

Make your picks for day 7 below. The OOP is made of win.

Good luck, guys!

Roland Garros Suicide Pool Day 6

Basically, fuck you, bad weather.

Ok, so rain fucked everyone over today. Rafa, ReRe and others didn’t get to play one minute of their matches today, so tomorrow’s schedule is a nightmare. Ana Ivanovic lost, as did La Monf. JJ, MAndy and RAndy got good wins.

Seeing as today was rained out for a long time,  if some of your picks couldn’t play at all, you can make a new pick for today.

If you made a pick who’s match is uncompleted, yet started, then you can post a provisional pick below and should your day 5 pick win, then your provisional pick  will be your pick for tomorrow.

Should your day 5 pick lose after completing said match, then your provisional pick won’t mean shit. Soz.

Unless you picked them yesterday, you CANNOT pick a player who’s match is already in progress.

Hope that’s clear!

Good Luck, guys!

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/index.html

RG: Suicide Pool Day 5

You guys know what to do. For those who are still waiting for some matches to be completed like me (WTF, Gael?) Make a pick just in case.

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/schedule10.html

Suicide Pool Day 4

Dick escaped. Rafa played like crap according to him. Hewitt beat Jezza probably making Jills hate RG even more.

You guys know what to do.

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/schedule9.html

Roland Garros Suicide Pool: Day 3

We here at HSM love Richie, Feli and so on, so today sucked major ass for us.

Anyways, life goes on, here’s tomorrow OOP:

http://www.rolandgarros.com/en_FR/scores/schedule/schedule8.html

As per usual, if your day 2 pick won, feel free to post your picks and back-ups in the comments below.

Good luck, guys!

Roland Garros Suicide Pool: Day 2

Hey guys…sucks that MJMS is out (for tennis-pool). Sucks that Ernie and Vika are out (bc I love them).

But there were still some awesome wins today. Jo came through in a tight 5-setter and Kiri, Robin, Marin and Misha all won in straights. So there’s something to be happy about.

Post your picks for Day 2 in the comments (if you didn’t lose lol). I’ll make a page for the results up top later so I can edit it throughout the tournament. But not right now, I’m too lazy.

Click Here for Day 2 Order Of Play

Have fun picking! 🙂

Birthday Boys

Today, May 22, is a fucking awesome day. Two of my favorite people were born today, Nole and Morrissey. As many of my twitter peeps know, I am a diehard Morrissey fan- he’s my fave singer of all time. He’s unique, he’s legendary, and he’s one of the most influential musicians of the last 30 years. There aren’t words for how much I love him.

The thing is- although I knew their b-days if you’d asked me, it didn’t even cross my mind that these two SHARED a b-day until today. But it makes a lot of sense. They’re both extremely intelligent, they’re both fiery and emotional, and they both (contrary to what Bozo might think) have GREAT hair. So here’s to two inimitable, exceptional and extraordinary BAMFs. Never change, guys. No matter what the haters say.

And speaking of haters, it seems like every Tom, Dick, and Bozo are giving Nole next to no chance to make the semis, let alone win the tournament. Screw you people. Yeah, it’s true Nole hasn’t had the best results this year, but let’s give the guy some credit. He’s a Top 3 player and he’s always a contender in my opinion. So really, the critics can suck it. (It’s no secret I want Nole to win the whole thing).

I want to dedicate this song to Nole and to Aleksa. Love.

Roland Garros Suicide Pool: Day 1

Hey everyone!! /Serena

I know I haven’t posted in 193849 days, give or take a few, but the excitement that is a Twitter/HSM Suicide Pool is enough to draw me in. Anyone who wants to join, feel free. Rules are easy and it’s just plain fun.

The first ever HSM Suicide Pool starts tomorrow, Day 1 of the French Open! Here are the rules:

-Every day once the Order of Play for the next day comes out, we’ll post it here in a daily post. You have a look at the Order of Play and you pick ONE male and ONE female player that you think will win their matches that day. Then you post your picks in the comments. Make sure to make your picks before play starts for the day, or they won’t count!

-You should also make BACK-UP picks for your first-choice players, in case one of your first-choice players withdraws before their match starts.

-You aren’t allowed to pick the same player twice during the tournament. In other words, you probably shouldn’t pick Rafa on the first day, since you won’t be able to use him again for the final! It’s best to pick lower-ranked players in the first few rounds, and strategy is important. You have to think ahead in the draw and save the best players for later.

-I’ll keep track of who you’ve picked so far over the fortnight so you don’t make the mistake of picking the same person twice.

-Once your player loses, you are OUT 😦 But we’ll be playing another SP for Wimbledon and that’s right around the corner! Practice makes perfect! 🙂

-Although we’re playing men’s AND women’s Suicide Pools simultaneously, they are in fact separate. This means that if your male player loses, you can continue to pick for females and vice versa.

-If you can’t post your picks here at the blog (can’t access the site from your phone, bad connection, etc) you can contact me (@RagingBitch) or Emma (@emmaphickey) on Twitter and we’ll post your picks for you.

-If you have any questions, ask on twitter or in the comments!

OK…I hope everyone is as excited as I am!

Click here for the OOP for Sunday, May 23 (Day 1)

And post your picks (and back-up picks) in the comments! Good luck guys 🙂